Glass Heart

How is this the time of my life?

I'm made of glass.

Thrown into a raging sea 

And told to swim.

My glass heart is warped by crashing waves 

That carry it into cliffs.

Our hearts are battered 

Shattered.

I'm so sorry I broke yours

As I was pulled away,

Your silence at its breaking 

Still echoing in my ears.

Eight little words 

Whispered.

Just like that.

The impermanence of human love revealed.

Father come save us.

Pluck each shard from the froth

And mend us.

Together or not.

Bring your path into focus 

Through our glass hearts.

~Lauren~ 

So I Go

So I Go

It seems like just yesterday that you took those first, wobbly steps, starting out like a newborn foal, balancing precariously on those two new feet. 

When did your little feet learn to walk so far? 

Learn to jump and dance and beckon me to watch you grow up. 

I remember tying your itty-bitty shoelaces and watching them run off and play, your innocent face beaming up at me. 

Now I watch as that face forms “I love you” with lips not so different than my own and eyes that gleam with excitement and anticipation. 

And so you go, 

Off into that adventure that I know you’re ready for, the one God made you for. 

With your wide eyes and eager feet, you set out on a brand new expedition for just you and God,

And so you go.

~

And I remember all those years of bedtime stories you told, even when you were sure I was already asleep. 

Tales of parting seas, slingshots and giants, and a miraculous resurrection. 

I remember wanting to be just like you when I grow up so I too could take grown-up steps in grown-up shoes. 

Now that I’m older, I realize that I’ve got to take my own grown-up steps and trust in the God you introduced me to. 

Don’t worry though, 

I’ll still come back when I need help tying those big-kid shoes and when I need reminding of who I want to be. 

I’ll always say I love you with this mouth that’s not so different from yours and tell you all about these adventures. 

So I go.

~Lauren~

Come Dance With Me

Come Dance With Me 

You've given in my dear.
Given in to the hisses
Allowed them to deafen your eyes
To the view from the mountain tops.

They've left you ignorant, my dear
To the fresh breeze grazing your cheek.
Your running feet echo through hearts ears
And mine.

Come curl your toes in the sand
Lift your palms to the sky.
See what you can do?
Unhindered, boundless, free?

Leave those barred teeth and naive words.
Quick! before you are plunged
Head-first.
Daughter, come dance with me.


~Lauren~

Vagabond

Vagabond

Feet run cold on crackling leaves 

In between birches standing erect.

The sun stands still as it watches her dart

Past sentries guarding centuries. 

Clad in winter worries and silver spoons 

She runs from snakes and wolves

 Snakes and wolves with their payments of compliments,

for what?

What do they want? 

To stop her in a tangle

In a mad subjection to the very thing she fears. 

A naivete that threatens to quell 

Her thinking heart.

So she keeps running, at least

Until coils drag her blindly backward 

Justifying childish forgetfulness.

Left in limbo

A vagabond.

~Lauren~

Habitus Insaniam

Habitus Insaniam

The wild and bewildered things hang on the fringe

With insanity's name reserved. 

Hardly.

We blindly declare ourselves:

Asinine,

Vacuous,

And, yes, inane.

Encountering a door we closed 

The mistake stares us in the face 

"I promise to learn"

"I promise to change"

Said as we welcome it in again.

"It will be different"

"It will be better"

Repined through ensuing delirium.

Caught in the dizzying carousel 

Fatuously wondering why our heads spin

And our pleas fall short.

We expected an easy aberration

...

One that was not promised 

And cannot be achieved alone. 

I am not exempt from this travesty.

This insanity. 

~Lauren~